Zombie invasion or are we just peripherally-challenged?
Updated: Sep 18
Most reasonable people would agree with the following statement: Covid lockdowns* not only did harm to the elderly (extreme solitude), to students (particularly young ones), and businesses but what they may not have realized is that they also created a massive population of... zombies!
Why make such a bold and potentially disturbing comment? Haven't we been traumatized enough (pandemic, Trump suggesting we drink bleach, Biden dosing off during interviews, rumors UFOs have been found, Kim Jong Un chumming up with Putin...heck I can continue forever here....) ?
Sadly, no we haven't (I know, I'm making no sense here)
It's just that I have NEVER in my life seen so MANY drivers handle their cars like they are utterly lost and confused as I have since the lockdowns ended. It's as if we've lost our spatial awareness! Who needs to go to the amusement park when the game of bumper cars has taken place right on our very roads...
Now let's be honest: people bumping into you at the mall, grocery store, or at your office (so much for employers being ok with their employees working remotely - boy that went out the window quickly didn't it) was not that uncommon before covid, what with our stupid iPhones being an extension of our bodies and all....but things seem to have escalated dramatically over the past 3 years....
Even walking NORMALLY has become a big ask of people. I have personally seen people just come to a sudden stop when getting off escalators, folks walking into the elevator and right into me as I attempted to exit, all these incidences appear to be our new post-plandemic reality (oops did I say that out loud).
Heck you won't believe what my 14-year old son did the other day....
We were at a restaurant in Orlando (Mexican if you were wondering...authentic guacamole if you really needed details ), walking away from our table, when I realized my teenage zombie had left his phone back there. "Daniel " I hollered "You left your phone on the table bro (gotta throw in the bro in there for them to pay attention)" . Now, my spaced out son had not realized that he had walked a few steps away from the table we had eaten at. He proceeded to look straight down with his hand reaching out in the air. Unfortunately for my clueless son he was standing at the wrong table and in fact he ended up staring right into a young woman's (big, if you're asking) bosom. Needless to say, the poor girl thought she was dealing with a pervert, and we had to apologize profusely to her and her parents.
I mean what the FUCK has happened to this world?! Like we weren't spaced out enough what with the ever-growing ADD that has gobbled up so many of us?
Oh Mr. Magoo would fit right in these trying times, surrounded by like-minded disoriented humans everywhere. Or perhaps we've been secretly hit by a zombie apocalypse? Have we become The Walking Dead? Or could it be that people now all have magnets in their bodies hence explaining all these collusions and bumpings (a covid vaccine consequence based on a theory from some of our far right, AKA wingnut, friends)?
Or have all these years spent playing video games (VR goggles to boot), the interminable months stuck at home, not driving or going anywhere, created a world where folks have become, shall we say politely, "peripherally-challenged"?
Look folks, no one is expecting you to be a sea urchin, a hawk or even a mantis shrimp (yes, all animals with 360 degree vision), but for the life of God, can we all try and put an end to this brutally frustrating tunnel vision so many seem to be suffering from?!!
* FYI just for the record, I was not against the lockdowns and understand the reasons behind being cautious especially when it came to protecting older people as well as anyone who was immunocompromised ....(this message was paid in part by all the G20 countries' governments...)
